Chickee Chickston's Super Deluxe Good Poems

I'm back and bloggin' less frequently than ever, baby!

Saturday, October 18, 2003

Who I'd Stalk if I Were an Insane Stalker--Special Cereal Edition
10. Quaker Oats guy
9. Boo-Berry
8. Smedly
7. Sugar Bear (He's Sammy Davis Jr. all over the place!)
6. Pebbles (as near as I can tell, Pebbles is the only female, cartoon cereal spokesperson)
5. Snap
4. The Trix Rabbit (I know it's an obvious choice, but I love the rabbit)
3. Snuggles, the fabric softener bear
2. The Grape Nuts Gopher
1. The Corn Flakes Rooster

Dear Readers,
Super Deluxe Good Poems has been undergoing changes recently. I pleased to announce those changes are now completed. Welcome to the new and improved Super Deluxe Good Poems. I've got brand new set of links and a new Blog O' Right Now feature. Clearly the Blog O' The Day thing wasn't working out all that well, so rather than walking around feeling like a huge bloggity failure, I opted for the open ended solution. I'm feeling pretty good about myself for the first time in months!

The first blog to be named Blog O' Right Now is Jim Berhle's Famous Monkey. Why? Three reasons: first, it's funnnnnnnnny! (the cartoons make me laugh), second, I'm lobbying for consideration for next year's Monkey awards, and finally, I know the pain of being a sports fan. So congrats to Jim!

Saturday, October 11, 2003

Dear Readers,
I'm not crazy about my most recent super deluxe good poem. I'd advise you to skip right over it. While you're at it, you might as well skip the previous one too. If you've already read it (or them), I feel really bad for having wasted your time (especially if you did all that crap that the more recent poem suggested). I'd like to make it up to you. Um, let's see, how can I make the time up to you? That's a tough one. I know, in your honor, I'm going to change my dog's name to Bloggy (it used to be Scout). You know, that's not gonna work; I already call my dog "Bloggy" from time to time. I'll work on it. If anyone has any suggestions, I'm listening. Again, my apologies.

Here's another super deluxe good poem

Just Fucking Do It
In order to properly read this poem
you must be standing on one foot
facing southwest
with your right hand extended upward
but your right elbow must be bent downward
the foot that is not touching the ground
should be pointing downward
your lips must be puckered
now wink twice with your left eye
followed by a single wink with your right eye
repeat this three times
at this point you should be remembering the last time you
thought about which spelling of ketchup/catsup you prefer
now stop thinking about that and adjust your eyeglasses
if you don't have eyeglasses
then sing the alphabet backwards
stopping at Q and starting up again at E
unless you are catholic in which case
you should say five "hail marys"
in either the "wassup" voice from the beer commercials
or in the "hellllooo" voice from that episode of Seinfeld where they said "hellllooo"

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

Ten People Whose Brains I'd Eat If I Were An Insane Zombie Stalker:

10. Mr. Hot
9. Carlton the Doorman (from the tv show Rhoda)
8. Larry from My Kangaroo
7. Goggles Pisano (Fred Flintstones race car driving alter ego)
6. The Gibson Girl
5. Any puppet made of ink, thumb, and forefinger
4. Hillbilly drummer girl.
3. Catherine Meng (with a bullet)
2. Morey amsterdam
1. The Amazing Kreskin

Was yesterday a great day or what? First I find out that I made Cat's stalkee list (#6--two ahead of Hootsie the Owl!!!!!! yes!!!! I beat the Owl!!!) and then I find out (via Kasey's page) that Mr. Hot and Kasey are editing a collection of articles on zombies and stuff. I can't wait for that book to come out, I'll tell you what!!!!

Saturday, October 04, 2003

Here's another super deluxe good poem for your reading enjoyment.

Close Enough
I'm not a haiku.
I have too many syllables
In my second line.

Thursday, October 02, 2003

Here's another super deluxe good poem.

Up and Out
The poem you are presently reading
snuck out of the house last week,
hopped on a freighter, and went to Paris.

When asked why
it replied that it had been inspired
by On The Road.

As it turns out
the poem's trip
was not all that interesting.

The poem ran
out of money
the first day.

Poetry should stay
inside until
it has more money.

I admire
little bugger.

I'll raise
his allowance.